Issues.

I have so many of them....

I feel like I am 90 years old everytime I stand up after sitting.

can't decide what to pack for my min vacation to Seattle for 3 days, when I finally pick out one thing (a dress for the graduation) I can't find the sash to go with it!! Then I tear apart my closet, get upset with my boyfriend for not helping and have a melt down where I end up curled in a ball on the floor. It then takes me an hour to finish packing.

I get distracted easily. I can't focus on one thing, like cleaning or packing or pretty much anything except training or cooking, for more than 5 minutes at a time. Just ask Loren how I easily abandoned my rummaging for give aways when interrupted by his daughter.

Sitting here I just got really dizzy for about 30 seconds.

I can't ride for more than an hour without back, left leg pain.

My bank account read $0.00 this afternoon, so I immediately had to transfer in my savings.

My call waiting doesn't work and I missed a call from my doctor tonight, lame. She did leave a voicemail saying that the x-ray of my back showed some pretty awesome wear and tear in my back/on my spine and I need to see a spine specialist. GREAT!! SO I relayed this message to my coach and she now says the only training I can do is pulling in the pool. WOOHOO!!!!!!!! ok so I guess that means I am taking some serious rest to try and recover my body and hopefully I can come back 100times better then before, hopefully.

Oh and it took me 30 minutes to decide what to wear tomorrow, this is why I generally wear the same thing every day.

Bionic? hmm.... sometimes I wish.

My most recent facebook status was "Christine is a total mess". I get a reply from coach Laurel asking me what and I said my body was revolting, she replied with "you're bionic".

REALLY!!!!?!?!?! Can I be?!?!

If I were bionic all I would have to do is power-down, have a mechanic work his wonders and then press the reset button.

Where's my reset button????

Lately I have felt fatigued. Actually more then fatigued, when I get off work at 1pm all I want to do is go and crawl into bed. Not hard to put 2 and 2 together to figure out my training has been suffering.

I have not been in the pool in 2 weeks (yikes!!) and I haven't put on my running shoes in a week and a half (uhh ohh!!). I pulled out of the Auburn half because mentally and physically I was in no shape to attempt such a course. Since Wild Flower I haven't been able to get my legs back nor my mind. Well that was until I did the Memorial Day crit.

At the crit I found that burn and that desire to push hard and want it. Too bad that feeling hit a wall 6 days later after Saturday's ride.

Three days last week I rode the paradise loop, each day with a different person; my roommate Steve, then my friend Marc, then my team mate Alissa. Each time I had a different workout to do and I accomplished them, but I was feeling my legs come Saturday's Riviera ride.

Luckily the ride only called for a couple climbs near the beginning, too bad the rest of it was rollers. My goal was to stay in my small ring and take it easy, just aim for time in the Saddle. I can say like 85% of the time I was doing just that but I was still moving pretty fast.

By about 2.5 hours in I was ready to be finished with the ride but I still had 1.5hours to go, ugh. I made it through and it was fun and the lunch was great but I was totally done after that.

Sunday and Monday I was not moving. Tuesday I raced TNT#3. Wednesday my back hurt from the moment I woke up. My throat started to hurt about 11am, by 4:30pmn I was passed out face down on my bed with my throat on fire. 7pm I couldn't talk. The next morning I slept through my alarm and woke up to my phone ringing and Andrew answering and telling my work I couldn't talk and wouldn't be in.

I spent the next 6 hours passed out. Stupid cold knocked my down hard.

Today I went to work, everyone said I looked awful. I felt awful. Not only from the cold but my back. I can't stand, sit, lie, bend forward, backward or sideways without major pain. WTF!?!?! Honestly I am tired of this!!!!

Ugh on top of that, every chiropractor and doctor I called today couldn't see me for like 3 weeks?!?!?!?!?! Crap there goes my training.

TNT #3-- the final one EVER, sad.

Going into this week's race I was not sure how I would do. Saturday I rode about 4 hours which was the longest ride I had done in weeks, and then I was pretty beat up Sunday and Monday. When Tuesday rolled around, mentally I wanted to get out there but physically I wasn't sure if my body would follow. Even driving up, I was tired and my stomach wasn't so happy (maybe this was nerves, maybe not).

Coach Laurel said she wanted me to get in a good long warm up so I "borrowed" roommate Kelly's trainer (Andrew promised if I buy him a netbook he'll get me a trainer). This went well. I did 35 minutes on the trainer and had some fun company doing it, I sat outside my truck while Andrew kept conversation and then Jeff from 2Wheel came up to chat and I even had my own little fan club of a little girl who kept telling me I was going "TOO FAST!!" and then decided to race me. Little girl running:1 Christine on trainer at 300 watts:0 but it was fun.

At the start line I was not where I wanted to be position wise, so during that first lap I made my way closer to the front of the group. This race deserves one word, sketch. In the pack no one seemed to want to hold their line but constantly moved when ever they felt like it and then would speed up and slow down. There was a lot of mass cornering and the pack sweeping out. I just kept my hands in my drops, hovering over my brakes just in case and was very weary of ever wheel around me.

At one point the pack swept the corner and forced the rider to my left into the center bank where he scrapped against his rear derailleur. All I could think was, "oh man I hope he doesn't over compensate and bounce back into me, ok crap I hope he doesn't fall and take me with him". Luckily he was able to keep moving forward and not hit me. PHEW!!

I looked down and saw HOLY CRAP it's been like 23 minutes (race is 25minutes long)!!! Okay I can do this I can stay in!! Well I thought I could but going into that last lap I was pretty cooked. I went to stand up to sprint and my arms shook, my legs wobbled and I felt vomit accumulating. Time to sit down.

It's ok cause I made it until the final lap!!! WOOT!! Wasn't dropped at all!! I am very pleased with this race, especially with how my training has been slightly lacking do to all my other issues (next post). Anyhow, crit racing rocks and I can't wait to get out there again!!

Sugar CRM Memorial Day Crit

Date: Monday May 25th, 2009

Category Raced: Cat 4 Women
Weather Conditions: like 50 degrees. COLD.

Field Size: 50

Early Birds Present: Alissa, Beate, Stephanie, Anne, Laurel

Teams Present: SugarCRM, TriFlow, Z-Team, Dolce Vita, Safeway, Roaring Mouse

Race Goal: Race hard and always stay in the top 15, be in the top 5 or 6 for each Prime, finish in the top 10

Team Race Goal: All top 15 finish

Report:

As I rolled out of bed and drove the .4 miles to meet Coach Laurel to carpool down I was really really hoping and praying that there was no fog in Morgan Hill. It was cold and icky in San Rafael and I was greeted with the exact same conditions at the race site. Ugh. I wish I had worn a warmer UnderAmor top.

Registered and layered, Laurel and I headed out for a little warm-up since I don't own a trainer or rollers (something to really get soon) and I was freezing! She asked what I needed to feel ready and my only response was "get warm". I would just have to rely on my body's feeling for this sense I didn't have a working HRM. I managed to break mine when I accidentally ran into Sarah and then proceeded to make-out with the asphalt. The one connected to my Powertap dislikes me and despite finding my old polar I think it is running a few (like 10) beats too high. So I was going with a body feeling to warm up.

After about 45 minutes including 2 good 2min build to sprints, I felt decently warm. This feeling only lasted about 2 minutes because I had to drop some layers in the car and then go stand at the ready on the start line for 5minutes. Although I wasn't quite to the point of shaking as Steph was. I did however wish I hadn't forgotten my gloves, my fingers were a little chilly, but I figured I had raced a triathlon in 45 degree temps, raining, in a skin suit without gloves so I would be okay.

The race started with a whistle and I was on the far right side of the start line. There would be 4 right turns on this approximate 1mile loop and we would race for 40 minutes and 5 primes. I wanted to get to the front, about 3 riders deep, and stay there as long as I could. I managed to do this for about 95% of the race and only found myself slipping back a couple times but it was from being boxed in, which I eventually maneuvered out of.

There were a few short lived attempts at break-a-ways, generally by this young girl whom was quickly recaptured by the pack in about 200 yards. I just kept laughing to myself every time she would jump forward and watch her get swallowed up in a very short time.

Each time a prime was called for I pulled to a good spot and crossed the line in my goal 5 or 6 spot and felt I could have gone for it but was following the "game plan".

Going into the last lap my legs were starting really feel the ache of consistent power and then surging forward often to keep my position. Until this point I had managed to maintain a relatively inside position, where I was feeling comfortable. Going into the last turn I was pushed to the center and boxed in. My only option was a gap I saw to the outside, I took it because it was the only way I could get clear. I hammered into the turn and made a feeble attempt to sprint to the line. I didn't have the right gear in place, my legs felt like stone and I was pretty sure if I had food in my stomach it would have been on my handle bars. Then I crossed the line about half a length back from teammate Beate but that landed me in 17th (three places back from B).

Over all the race was really really fun and way less intimidating then the Tuesday Night Twilight's. My only issue was the inconistency in corner setting up and with that the speed change through the corners. Time after time many woman would opt to stop peddling and cost through the corners which caused them to slow down and the riders behind them to nearly be on top of their wheels. It was rather frustrating.

The other issue I had was the inconsistency of speed. At one point I found myself on the wheel of a woman who would speed up for 5 stokes then slow. I tried to back off her and then she managed to swerve a tick right and nail my front wheel. I was able to keep everything under control and even received a "good job". From the woman to my right.

In the end I am pleased that I was able to stay up in the front as long as I did and maintained my goal of always being in the top 15. This is great especially since I haven't been in my top training mode and felt I might be a little out of shape. I was happy that I was able to keep my breathing under control and just focus on the wheels in front of me. I felt strong for 95% of the race and know that I can just get stronger.

I was a little miffed that I didn't meet my top 10 goal, since I was so much apart of that front group the whole time. I know it comes down to positioning into that last turn and just having the legs to out hammer everyone else in the end. Lots to learn but I can't wait!!

TNT#2 - a little bit on the late side

Last week I rode in my second crit and the second in the Tuesday Night Twilight series. This went way better then the first.

I arrived really early and by that I mean I was there at like 4:50pm and the race was at 6pm but I would much rather be early then have to rush and not get a warm up in. First thing I noticed was it was freaking WINDY!!! Although the wind did switch from the previous week to the back stretch, which happens to be the longest part of the 0.7 mile course.

I was able to get a good half hour warm up in, some of it done with teammate Michal, then I waited a little bit near the line so I could grab a front spot. This worked greatly to my advantage in the first "neutral" lap. Why is the neutral lap not so neutral? Silly boys always ride it so fast!!

After the neutral lap I was able to stay tight in the pack for 3 laps, about 7minutes worth. My legs and lungs were burning and I just couldn't keep the pace up so I slid back. I tried to slow down and jump back in. This time I did it without any guidance from coach Laurel. I waited and slid around the corner to the back stretch and let the pack sweep me in while I took the inside line on the last corner. This time I was able to stay in for 4 laps before I thought I was going to lose my cookies.

I was determined to get in one more time and stay in until the end. I was able to time the pack and get in on the same stretch/corner I did the previous time and this time found a really good spot in the pack. I was in for 2.5 laps when the "3 to go" sign went up. I knew I could stay in until the last lap at least. That last lap was a doozie. An all out sprint that took everything I had. I was sliding back through the pack but it was all I had and I was still able to finish mid pack.

Ok so improvements...1. I only got dropped twice not 3 times 2. I was able to stay in an additional lap each time which was great 3. I got back into the pack all by my self.

Goals for next TNT... only get dropped once and hang on longer. Be more confident in my position in the pack and not let anyone push me around.

Tuesday Nigth Twilight Crit #1 (TNT)

This was my first crit and it was CRAZY!

So the race began at 6pm and Sarah and I rode from her house (8miles) playing urban traffic adventure cycling to the race. On the way there we came across some others headed in our direction, one of which was a NORCAL girl whom we raced with at Wente a few weeks back.

In the innocent chit chat NORCAL girl dropped the news (which of course I had no clue of) that all CAT 4/5 men and women race together. Ummm... YIKES!! Really it didn't freak me out that badly, I like riding with the boys.

Registration was annoying and I think I was pretty annoying myself to Sarah when she was trying to help me pin on my number. In fact I think I made her move it around about 3 times. SORRY SARAH!! I think it was nerves.

Then Michal and I rode around the course quickly to get warm about 3 times. I still was not sure what to expect and just wanted to get started.

At the start I was about mid way back and I really wanted to be near the front. Not for next time, line up early and grab a front spot. The first lap was supposed to be "neutral" and "very slow" but by my speedometer is was still in kinda fast like 20mph. Then the race just seemed to take off and I struggled to stay but found myself falling back rather quickly.

Michal and NORCAL girl were ahead of me but after a few times around I passed them and found Laurel who told me to slow down and let the pack come back around and "eat me up" again.

So my first time to jump back in I was nervous but Laurel was right behind me yelling "go go go" and so I went and a guy yelled at me which through me for a minute but I wanted in. So I kept trying to grab a wheel but each time I seemed to keep being pushed out again. I was only able to hold on a lap before being on the outside at each turn eventually lead to me falling back.

So I went to spin again and waited for another chance to jump in. This time I caught group on the inside and while it was a little more nerve racking around the turns I was able to keep my line and grab some wheels. This time I stayed in for 2.5 laps before thinking I was going to puke.

I wanted one more shot but I was only able to grab the pack about a half lap before the finish.

It was such an exciting 25mintutes and I can wait until next week. So much to learn!!!

Wild Flower Race Report--- pure pain.

Unfortunately I knew from the beginning that this was not going to be a good race. Friday night I didn't even want to go my shoulder was bothering me and I was just tired so I went to bed at like 9. I woke up 11 hours later on Saturday and felt better but still not like I wanted to go. I hate wasting money and I know I would kick myself later if I didn't go. So I got myself up, swam a little, hopped on the bike sweated some then threw things together, into the truck and headed south.

I declared that camping in itself is a sport why complicate triathlon by adding a 4th sport, tri means three right??

Luckily Jocelyn (Captain) and Amy had camp set up along with to other friends of Jocelyn's, Brad and OC, so really that was nice and I just needed to register and chill until race time. That turned out to be a LONG time, I have never had so much time and such a relaxed pre-race before. It was weird. I am not sure if I liked it or not. I think not.

I didn't even really know what to think pre-race other than, make it hurt and go hard. I was majorly pissed when I pulled on the back of my wetsuit and managed a small tear in it. I mean I have worn it TWICE and UGH!!!! Still annoyed.

The swim was great for the first 400 or so. Actual start I have had, I didn't get thrashed even once. I felt fast and then I looked up and was like WTF, awe man I am pulling too hard left. From that point on I couldn't seem to find a straight line. I came out of the water at 27:40, which bested my last lake Olympic swim time by 2 minutes, and I checked, a year ago I swam my first race 4 minutes slower, so I guess I can be happy with that. This was the highlight of my day apparently.

I was really annoyed with the hill immediately after the swim. It was just mean and I was too dizzy to really run so I tried but I walked.

I struggled out of my wetsuit, and I think there was a lovely string of profanities coming from my mouth when I couldn't get it over my timing chip. The girls around me gave me dirty looks, I grabbed my bike, helmet and ran. T1= 3:09 pretty bad.

I think I psyched myself out for that first hill. It was long and hard but I was mentally not in it and that would cost me for the next 10miles. Amy passed me about 3/4 of the way up and I just deflated. I wanted to catch her but I just couldn't get my legs to turn over the pedals. About 8 miles in I stopped to check my back wheel cause it just felt so utterly sluggish. It wasn't the back side, it was me. I just needed to toughen up and it wasn't happening.

At mile 10 there was a great flat stretch coming off a descent and my legs finally felt able to come to life and move. The last 14miles I just wanted to hammer hammer hammer but I knew if I wanted to finish the race I would have to hold something back for the run. Even if my bike time turned out to be icky I would still have legs to run on. Well that was the plan.

I felt great the first 2k but then my throat seemed to close and I couldn't get any amount of oxygen and the world started to fade. So I slowed to a walk. I wanted to finish and I knew that I am able to push it to the point of black out but really was it worth it? I just wanted the weekend to count for something.

I tried to get my breathing under control, when I thought I had it I picked up my feet and moved. Too bad my shuffle is faster than many people's runs, because of this it seemed that every quarter mile I had to slow and let my throat open and breath. This sucked and I was tempted to push to blackout but I knew that wasn't bright.

At one point some Team in Training coaches stopped me and wouldn't let me continue until my breathing was clear. They got distracted by some of their runners and I took off, albeit incredibly slow but I wanted to be done with the whole mess.

At the 8k mark I said I would either get through the last 2k running or I would collapse. I am a good down hill runner and so the last 1mile had a 3/4mile down hill and I just let my legs fly, the only work I did was to keep my feet far enough above the ground so as not to trip and to make sure I wasn't going to fly ass over teakettle.

Too bad that last 1/4 mile was flat and my legs felt like rubber and cement combined. I begged for the finish and of the 10 girls I flew past down the hill 3 came by me in the finish shoot.

Ugh.

I crossed the line and just let go. I hit the ground the next thing I know I am in the med tent covered in a blanket with an oxygen mask on my face. This is where I remained for the next 45mins attempting to regain composure. It was lame.

Jocelyn and Brad came looking for me worried. Apparently Kelly saw them bring me in and they were checking up on me. I just wanted to curl up and sleep, too bad that wasn't allowed.

I have no clue what happened to me in this race. I just pretty much died from the get go and that is just annoying. I am so much faster and better at this then I have been showing. I don't feel like I have had a really good race since Vineman last July and that is somewhat disheartening, but then again I have only been at this for a year.

One of my new bike teammates suggested that the law of averages is on my side and I should be on my up swing soon. I sure hope so.

I would report my times but they are rather pathetic. If you want to know them you can find them on the results page for the race.